Sunday, June 17, 2012

The psychology of the beautiful woman - Part 3

In the first two posts of this theme I have mainly talked about the woman's’ relationship with men. Of course she also has to relate to the other 50% of the worlds population - all the other females. What are some of the psychological consequences of the very physically attractive woman doing this?
It seems that she is in the same position as any exceptional woman. Those who may have exceptional ability in sport or academically or perhaps special musical ability. How does this effect the relationship with her same sexed peers.
My answer to this by and large depends on how she handles it. There will be a group of peers who develop quite envious feelings about her specialness with men. However this would usually not be a large group. I have talked previously about envy here.

Hand stand

I think it is safe to say that most women will not feel envious to any significant degree and indeed they will feel happy for the attractive woman. I have done a bit of ad hoc research on this. On Facebook one can look at many peoples photographs, sometimes the owner of the Facebook will be a very attractive female. I came across one the other day of a woman in her early twenties who is very physically attractive and she had the usual collection of photographs. Some of the pictures were her all dressed up, socializing somewhere highlighted all her attractive physical features. I have cited the 27 comments that followed her picture and have indicated which were made by females (14) and which were made by males (13).
amazing - m
your body is insane - f
outfit = niice ahhaha - f
insane body and looks :) - m
stunning! - f
fukn hell - m
holy shit. that is all - m
electraaa :) - m
:) you look soo good - m
fuck me - f
you are so hot - f
your amazingg! - f
Such good tattoos and costumee - f
amazing - f
O amazing - m
best compliment when people say we look alike! your gorgeouss - f
wow.. you are amazing - f
100% pornstar - m
your body ! - f
OH MY GOD! - m
i hate it - f
amazing - f
yummmy - m
JESUS! - f
pornstar? - m
Small tan - m

Two women

Only one comment is adversarial. Of course there may be others who have felt envious and simply not commented but it is interesting to see that just as many females have commented as males and the female comments are kind and nice and complimentary. 
This was typical of other pictures she had and it shows that females are prepared to make public comment, enjoy her good looks and wish her well. This is what I would have expected to happen which is nice to know.
However it seems reasonable to assume that a lot of it depends on how she handles her beauty. Does she shove it in others faces, does she develop a sense of superiority because of it, does she let others know how much more beautiful she is than them.  If she does not do such things then most people are going to like her and not be put off by her and her appearance. If she treats others with respect then they will do the same back no matter what she looks like. There is nothing amazingly remarkable in such a proposal. Really it is a bit of a non issue for the same sexed peers of the beautiful woman if she handles it well.


From a parenting point of view it can be a difficult scenario when she reaches early adolescence and discovers what her physical appearance can get her. In particular the effect it can have on males. The parents need to be sensitive to the view of males that she is beginning to develop. There are a group of males she will be able to exploit and exploit a lot including direct financial exploitation. Of course a parent is not wanting this to happen.

I recall many years ago a small group of girls in my social circle who used to boast they could go out on a Saturday night with no money and come home fed and inebriated. Nobody likes a user and I made sure I kept them at a safe distance.

Finally we have the very difficult parenting situation where one daughter is very attractive (or has some other form of exceptional ability) and the other daughters are not. This can sometimes result in the cinderella life script. The parents downplay the attractiveness of the one daughter so the others don’t feel so bad or not as good as their beautiful sister. 
Alternatively the parents may repeatedly highlight the one daughters beauty and not mention the other daughters and this can have a detrimental effect on the sisters. A difficult parenting situation indeed that needs to be handled with caution.


  1. Do you think that the woman on Facebook would have FB friends who would be so unkind as to say anything nasty?

    Recently a journalist by the name of Samantha Brick had the audacity to write an article about how women were jealous of her beauty. The comments that followed showed very clearly how quickly women will pick up the poison pen. Behind the guise of anonymity people can be very brutal.

  2. Yes Linda,

    It is hardly piece of good research that I propose. The sample was biased. People may have made unkind comments and she may have deleted them. However it does show that there are a group of women who are capapble of not getting lost in envy and can wish the attactive woman well.

    this is what I would have expected to see from my observations of people over the years. No matter who you are or what you look like some people are capable of still seeing the person and relating with them.

    I knew a couple who won the lottrey a few years back. they weren't my best friends but I knew them reasonably well. When I first heard I felt a pang of envy and "why wasnt it me kind of thing". But it was not long before I felt that it was thier good luck and wished them well.

    Far more important than looks or money is how the person treats others in determining how others will respond, I think it is safe to say.